This is at least the fourth blog I’ve started. Of the previous three, the first has been formally decommissioned, the second lies dormant at the bottom of the sea of bits and bites and nsfw images known as the internet[s], and the third is still up and running and, as far as I know, still captained by my able co-blogger. After hearing that I essentially threw in the towel on three previous blogs, you might be suggesting that I am not responsible enough to pen a successful blog. You might be saying, “Listen Dan, women, parties and your impressive career got in the way of your first three blogs, what makes you think you should write another one?” Well, I like to think of my prior blogging work as practice for what I believe will be my masterpiece. (Note: since I haven’t updated any of those blogs in months, I’m still out of practice, so let’s not consider the first few months of this as part of my masterpiece, okay?). And that is reason enough to start a new blog.
Another reason to start a new blog is change. I want to make some changes from my prior blogging work. For one thing, I want to stay anonymous, hidden behind a thinly-veiled pseudonym. That way the chances of A-holes from high school that I never want to see again finding this by googling me are lower. Also, most of my previous blogging was done with a political bent. When I was blogging politics, I was always reading other political blogs. This was stupid because then I would try to argue with the morons that wrote said other political blogs and then I’d get all ornery, and then I would weep for the future of this country. So this here rag will be decidedly apolitical. I will even throw in a little political misdirection here and there so that you will be totally unable to tell what my actual stance is with respect to issues like immigration and baby-killing.
I’m thinking that maybe the format for this blog will be similar to that of the popular television series, LOST. As fans of the kick-ass show know, each episode of LOST juxtaposes the present day struggles of the cast on the Island with a flash-back of one particular character off the island. Through the two stories, each episode provides insight into the bizarre happenings on that show, and also provides insight into the bizarre happenings of the show we all call Life. So my posts will alternate between current goings-on in my life and flashbacks to prior character-building experiences I’ve had. Just like LOST. Well, just like LOST if instead of featuring an ensemble cast of diverse people from various backgrounds overcoming obstacles on a mysterious island while at the same time overcoming their own personal struggles, it featured a guy that grew up in the suburbs and now sits at a desk all day. I also hope to sprinkle in some stuff about the news, movies, sports and books I pretend to have read and stuff like that.
Anyway, I hope you like reading this garbage.